Drowning in my sorrows...

Lately, things have been very tough, real tough, feelings become complicated, friendships getting distant, memories keep coming back to remind me what I'm losing, and the hurt to see someone so close to me slowly going away...

As if being sick real bad isn't painful enough, the emotional pains make it so much worse... It's been really, really tough to fathom why we were so close last time, and now suddenly, we're drifting apart, no matter how much or how hard I want this to maintain, I guess you found someone better who can care for you better, I should be happy for you then, but what does that make me? I feel like I'm always not good enough you know, you shouldn't just leave me hanging like this, slowly drifting apart without at least explaining to me why? All I want are answers, and I just want to talk about it, but you're having your major exams soon, so I try my hardest to fight through this pain and hold on, because I respect you a lot, and I don't want to disturb your studies, but how much longer will I have to be left hanging?

When I think back to those times a few months ago, when we could just hang out like best friends, just doing things together, I really loved those times, I feel I had a genuine friend that is willing to be with me and accept me for who I am, then lately I feel that I've been replaced by another person in your life, and suddenly we're no longer close, and now I feel so left out, and being replaced hurts, I know that guy is so much better and he's good for you (and me as well, I know) but please, don't leave me hanging, don't let me be replaced...

The word I keep emphasizing, "replaced" because it's true, nowadays I've been replaced as your travelling and going out buddy, I've been replaced as a close friend, I've been replaced as the person that's always there caring for you in your life, and it hurts, I feel so hurt, gullable, insecure, that after everything that we've been through, you would just leave me this way and not care... Please show me at least you care...

This has got to stop one way or another... Whichever way, all I want is closure, a chance to set things straight, and keep moving forward, with or without you...