2010: The Year In Review

Where do I start? 2010 has been a momentus year, so many things happened in one year that it was so awesome! This was the year that had a profound effect on me, as I turned 20, left my teenage years behind, but not my friends, made new friends, had wonderful moments, and Spain finally won the World Cup! What an incredible year, and the story begins on a cold night in January...

January
The year started where 2009 left off, but with major changes ahead.. The SHC Thanksgiving Dinner kicked things off, and I managed to spend time with my sis Bianca, and before she started school for her PMR year... I thought it was the last time I got to see her, but I got to meet her again after that =) then it was off to INTIMA Conference at Metropolitan College, Subang Jaya, and it was incredible! I learnt alot from the experience, being with fellow students from other INTI campuses, and hanging out with my INTIMA friends around, it was an experience I'd never forget! =D

February
The start of February was all about family, journey back to my roots, and then Chinese New Year! Went out with my bestfriends and my loves on 19th, a day to remember, and we watched Percy Jackson! :3 I miss this day =) then the next day Johenson had an open house, and it was fun! XD! Then the month ended with a Youth Concert at SHC, and I guess that's it, the two days on 19th and 20th being the highlights =D

March
My birthday month! Spent my birthday (belated) with my loves and I had a great time, even though my sis had to go to training early... Then it was RAY Camp! This year's RAY Camp was the 2nd time I was helping out, and we had a series of meetings and preparations for the camp, and I must say, this camp really was great for me, it meant alot to me, I experienced the power and love and worship the Lord, and I'm really thankful for this opportunity! =D The camp itself was nice, and I think more towards me personally... After camp was a post-meeting, then World Youth Day celebration at SHC to end the month...

April
It was Easter weekend, and we went to St.Simon, and met my bro and sis there =D Aldric and Bianca, and it was nice to see them during blessed Easter time =) Then it was a double day the next day, with Tess' birthday party, then my relatives' engagement, so balik kampung and met my cousins! =D Then 11th April was Bakat Interact, and I went to see some old friends, I went with my bro n sis, and met many old friends and besties... The day was fine, although there were some problems... All in all, April was a good month, but it was also the start of something that was to continue until now, the end of the year...

May
The month of May was to be the big one, as I was due to perform for my college dinner, and the dinner itself was a big occasion, as we were the organisers, and it was a real challenge to organise and perform, and together we did it! =D so thanks INTIMA 15th batch! The INTI Night was nice and to me, it went well, I'm sure everyone else thinks so... After the dinner, on 28th May was my sis' confirmation, and my cousin n friends as well, so congrats to all of ya Confirmation Class of 2010! Then that night was the KDCA-ISCEP Concert, as usual every end of May for Ka'amatan, and I went with my old buddies, and met Theodora, oh my gucci! =D hehe... had a good night with them! ^^ Theo! haha...

June
Ah, the month where the biggest event started, the 2010 FIFA World Cup in South Africa! It was the start of a month-long festival of football and everything that went with it, and it was awesome right from the beginning! On 9th June, I went out with Aldric and Bianca, just the 3 of us, for some quality time, although Jerome and Cassandra were supposed to come but couldn't make it, so it was just the 3 of us, me with the 2 people I love alot, and I had a nice day, makes me feel like I really have a family with siblings!

July
SPAIN, 2010 FIFA WORLD CUP WINNERS! SPAIN ARE WORLD CHAMPIONS! What more can I say? July was all about THE final, THE biggest match! Spain were crowned World Champions on the 11th of July, after 64 matches, 30 days and hours of action, there was one winner, Spain!

On 1st July, I went out with my old classmates and friends from school, and it was nice and wonderful to be able to meet them again! We went for a movie, KKbox-ing, and dinner by the waterfront, and it was nice to spend time with them again =D then 4th July was SFC Concert, and I went to support my sis who's in the choir! Go Bianca! =D hehe... and my friends Empty Papers performed as well XD! so it was nice... on 14th July, another day out with Lorenzo, Anthea, to do covers, and I just helped out along, and we eventually had an awesome day and night together! =D Then on 25th it was RAY 9th Anniversary, and celebration all around! It was fun, and RAY has been around for long! =)

August
After an incredible July, came the exam month of August, my last month of my Diploma, and thank God I passed it all! I finished my diploma on time, and what relief! 13-15 August weekend was one of the best! First there was SHC Youth Praise Nite, combining all youths, den on 14th my friends Olivia and Charlton Gomes celebrated their birthday, and 15th it was the Bruce Kuhn Broadway show at SHC... Then two of the best days I will never ever forget, first up Johenson's birthday, then Charlotte and Charlene Jumin's Twin birthday! =D it was awesome and fun, and with friends, it was nice! =) then at night I met Angel and Francess and we hung out, after a long time I haven't been with them... hehe... After all that, my final exam, and yeah, I did all that BEFORE exams, and still I got good results... ehehe...

September
Finally, I had some free time, and I started all my unfinished business, cleaning up the house, cathcing up on old times and events, and most importantly, my driving license! XD! on 6-9 September, there was a PBK event at SHC, and I got to help for the first day only, where the youths perform on the opening day, and it was nice, I was the compman and cameraman XD! After that it was all normal, many little things happened, I hang out with friends and that's it... Then 23rd September I celebrated my bestie Angel's birthday with a lunch at Upperstar Lintas, and that's about it for the month, I guess.. hehe..

October
My sis' birthday month! :3 aww! hehe... For her birthday, I made her a special card and a gift, and I managed to give her exactly on her birthday, and I got to meet her even though awhile only =) then it was 10-10-10, and I attended my friend's charity event, not a bad way to celebrate triple 10, just wish I had my loves n besties with me... oh well maybe 11-11-11 next year! =) then on 16th October it was another sis/cuz (distant cuz ^^) birthday, and we celebrate at Water World, and it was my 1st time there! =) I spent d day with Abigail and Vernessa, awesome! ^^ then we had a last minute outing with Ameline and Lorenzo on 18th, with Ivan and Aiman joining later on... on 23rd October. it was my bro Aldric's school concert, Shan Tao Brass Band with Kian Kok, and I went with my sis Bianca to support him, and the concert was lovely! Brass Band Orchestra reminded me of orchestral movements and pieces, and I really enjoyed it, especially as a musician and music lover =) October ended with me wishing all the SPM students all the best for their exams, especially my besties and siblings =)

November
When November came, what was in store was way beyond comprehension, something happened that still affects me now, and I really, really wished it didn't happen... But first, on 5th November, Lifeline had a BBQ Picnic, and it was nice, and it was the first time besides camp that I joined Lifeline's activity, and I hope to join more in the future =) This year, the Malaysian International Challenge Badminton was held at Likas, from 9-14 November, and I went for the first 2 days on 10th and 11th, because 12th I had to go to KL for my Convocation, and then 15-22 head to Singapore for a family holiday! The tournament was nice, although it was a 4th-tier event, many top players came, especially local players like Tan Chun Seang, Chong Wei Feng, World Junior Champions Ow Yao Han and Chooi Kah Ming, runner-up Loh Wei Sheng, and Sabah's very own talented shuttlers, namely Beryno Wong, Amelia Anscelly, Winson Neo, and more! The first two days brought many exciting matches, and some upsets as well... I really learnt alot from watching top class players play, and got some experience... =)

Then 12th I was off for my convocation in INTI Nilai, on 13th November, with my classmates and collegemates... As soon as I arrived, we were already rushing here and there, it was really hectic, before the convo! The day itself presented some challenges, but thank God everything went smoothly in the end... Then 14th I went out for a stroll in KL, and met Deon, Mortigou and Samantha... 15th I headed to Singapore, unbeknowing what was to hit me... From KL, I was already feeling unwell, sick, but I just kept going, and trying to supress the pain, and upon reaching Singapore, something happened...

On 17th I got chickenpox, and then I got quarantined for 2 weeks, and was only allowed to return on 2nd December, and to hear that news was gut-wrenching, heartbreaking, to be detained there, and stay an extra 12 days, costed me... I really hate myself, wondering where did I get it from, and I really was down and upset... I had to stay longer, yet I can't even go out jalan2 and shop, until the last 5-6 days, and even that I had to control myself and not really get too near to avoid spreading it... That extra time, I can't even go home to see all my loved ones, that time I really, really missed them... I missed LT Anniversary, carolling practice, and basically alot of stuff, and till now I'm still trying to catch up lost time..

December
... and I finally returned from Singapore on early December, and straight away caught up with carolling practice, thank God I could still join, and I ended up alright... although I lost time to hang out with friends and practices, I could still catch up... This month was an awesome month, and yet there were some sub-plots of twists that linger on... Carolling was awesome, as always, and I really had a great time! I joined Melissa Audrey's group again this year, and to my carolling group, great job! =D

Besides that, I had many days out with loves and friends, from 18th to 22nd, it was a really packed and awesome straight period, in 1Borneo and Suria two days straight! =) 18th at 1B with Abby, Sha, Wes, Ivan, Jav, Sam, Ari and Yeehui, 20th and 21st at Suria with some of them again plus Jerome XD! and 21st night was RAY Christmas Dinner, and I had a great night with my dear friend Leisa ^^v, my besties Angelica, Francess and gang! =) Took lots of pics which I uploaded in FB.. hehe.. Then 22nd, Jude's group had a Xmas Thanksgiving dinner at one of the aunty, Aunty Jeanette's house, and I went along with the group, the ones which went were Abby, Sha, Vina, Ivan, Jav, Nad, Simon, Wes, and Jude himself! =D had a crazy awesome night, and took even more pics with them! =D

And just yesterday on 28th, I went out with my old classmates and friends from Maktab Sabah, a mini-reunion of some sorts, and to meet them again, especially the star of the show, Alvin Wilson, all the way frm France! XD! I managed to hang with Alvin, Jo, Mort, Loren, Anthea, Sam, Ivan, Agnes, Diniy, and Zeff... Leslie and Ray couldn't make it unfortunately... It was nice and awesome to be with them again, and made me recall and miss school days... heck we talked about whar we did at school, ah the memories... XD! Watched Gulliver's Travels, awesome funny gila! haha! then we went to K-box at Growball punya, not many song choices, sadly... then off to Secret Recipe Warisan for some drinks and deserts... after that Diniy and Zeff went home, and me, Al, Jo, Mort n Anthea went to watch 'Letters From A Friend', another production by the Green Leaf Theatre House, for charity, and it was really good! Theatre play that really got u! After that went to have dinner in Dongz, before spending the night playing pool at Millenium, and I sucked at pool! :O finally went home at 1 am! XD! what a great day! I miss them now already =') perfect way to close the year... =D

.................................................................................
So as I write this, its almost new year eve, and I guess I had such a wonderful year, so many memories, moments, and I don't want the year to end, coz next year I may have to say goodbye to some of my loves and closest people, my besties and siblings, who will be going away...

Overall, this year was really filled with so many talking points, the biggest of them all, has to be Spain, worthy World Champions! It's gonna be sad to leave this year behind... I experienced so many emotions, happy, sad, to seeing loved ones gone, and dealing with the pain of a loss, as I was turning 20, and leaving my teen years behind, lost and found friends, everything you can think of, I've been through it this year... Learn from mistakes, and I really learnt who my true friends and bro and sis are... I don't know how to end this, except, 2010 was incredible, and it set the tone for my life...

Smooth Irony

So this is what have become,
Of the broken hearted and lonely,
Left to sail the seas alone,
In search of thy one true love.

And so it has changed,
The game of love,
Played by many a lover,
Yet rewards so few a victor.

One day some will win, Another some will lose,
The circle of life keeps spinning,
Left to chance and a throw of a dice.

And so it begins,
Another day, another dream,
While someone's hopes come unstuck,
Many more hopes come undone.

The irony of life as lived by many,
They search high and low,
Far and beyond,
For something just within reach.

So live your life simple,
Love the one your with,
Never leave them behind,
Cherish and treasure them till the end!

2010 Commonwealth Games Badminton Mixed Team Champions...

Malaysia!

After years of not winning the mixed team title, they won it for the first time in a long while, back in 2006.. and now, 4 years later, they've defended their Mixed Team title, after a hard fought battle against first time finalists, India, winning 3-1...

First up was Mixed Doubles, and just as 4 years ago, Malaysia decided to pair a scratch pair, Koo Kien Keat and Chin Eei Hui, against Diju V and Jwala Gutta... and the scratch pair gave Malaysia the perfect start, winning against the more fancied and higher ranked pair 21-14 10-21 21-10.

Next was Men's Singles, and Lee Chong Wei faced the dangerous up and coming Parapulli Kashyap, and the first game was neck to neck, with both players trading smashes and wonderful net exchanges... Eventually Lee Chong Wei held his nerve to win the opening game 21-18, and from then on controlled the second set to win 21-8, and give Malaysia a 2-0 lead in the team event.

Third match was Women's Singles, and Wong Mew Choo faced an uphill battle against the in form Saina Nehwal, home crowd as well... This match was a classic on the cards, and a classic it was. Both players going neck to neck, and really fighting hard for every point, a trademark of both Mew Choo and Saina... 1st set went to Mew Choo 26-24, after a nerve wrecking tiebreaker. At this point, Malaysia were a set away from the title, but Saina had other ideas, as she took the next two sets 21-17, 21-14, and winning a point for India. 2-1 now.

With the vociferous home crowd now cheering India on, the following match is Men's Doubles, and on paper it was a banker for Malaysia, with World No.1 Koo Kien Keat and Tan Boon Heong facing Rupesh Kumar and Sanave Thomas. Koo and Tan raced out of the blocks, and started fast, thundering down smashes and decisive net plays, to take the 1st set 21-12. The second looked like a formality, but Koo and Tan were made to fight for each point, and made to sweat, before finally winning a close set 21-19, and with it victory for Malaysia!

Eventually Malaysia won 3-1, and congratulations to the team! Congratulations to India as well, Silver medalists, and England, Bronze medalists... On to the individual badminton competition!

Step Up 3D!

Gosh I was supposed to make this post a week ago, then I forgot! haha! anyway here it is...



I SO TOTALLY LOVE STEP UP 3! It was awesome! From the first moment to the last, I literally had my eyes and mouth wide open in anticipation, and excitement! It was so cool, and the thing I liked most was that it had many sub-plots to the main story, so it was nice... I especially like Moose and Camille, they're so cute and so sweet together... :3 awww! sehh!


I wish I was damn thinner, then I could attempt to dance and move like them all, woah! I love the dances, the moves, and gosh, I would love to try it... sadly, I cant... haha! The movie was in 3D, so it added a layer of excitement to it, although not all scenes seem to have 3D, I noticed, but overall it was nice... Certain scenes had it jumping out of the screen, literally... XD!

I wouldn't mind watching it again in 3D, worth it! No doubt! hehe... Just wish I could bring my sis along, maybe after PMR... =) Bianca! quick finish ur PMR! hehe... her PMR exams are coming, so to my dearest sis, all the best and God bless for your exams! Do ur best and score with flying colors! ^^

Destination

While I was cleaning up my room, and tidying all my stuff, I found some CDs I had since I was young, and they range from Matchbox 20, Blue, Robbie Williams, to Boyzone and Ronan Keating... heh nice taste when you're young aye... boybands and all... much like the growing up of me, I outgrew those and moved on to blues and jazz, but that doesn't mean those bands and those selections when I was young was tacky, it's still music... What I've learned is that making music is not easy, so that's why I respect every artist that makes music, and produces it...

Learning the guitar these last few years, along with some basic music theory and watching the process has definitely made me appreciate music more, so I don't really look down on any, and now I can look at those selections from when I was young from a different point of view... I've been lucky to learn all these, from a layman's view; I don't consider myself a musician, maybe a basic one, but more towards a music fan and avid listener... Though the progress continues on my guitar...

I love music alot, heck everyone does, and you'll all agree with me when I say that without music, life is boring and monotonous...

Anyway, when I took the albums out for a spin, and now playing is Ronan Keating's 2003 album "Destination", it suddenly brought back memories of me in Form 1 (it was released when I was in sec school) and life in secondary school for the first time... Then from learning and adapting in Form 1 and 2 to progressing in Form 3 onwards... I really thought alot about the years, the memories, and most of all imagining myself back to that point in time... aaahhh...

I think the generation nowadays are very privelleged to have all the technology and advancements all round, especially in social communication, and music... In my days in Form 1 we had no Facebook, Tumblr, Twitter and the works, heck even Friendster was quite uncommon those days... I only got mine in Form 2 I think... Before that, it was plain old telephone and MSN, just ask ma best bud from primary school all the way till now... XD!

Back when I was in Form 1-3, those years, Friendster was the thing, and MSN before and during that time... When it was Form 5, Facebook suddenly started to progress, and soon everyone hopped on the bandwagon... Progress is a beautiful and scary proposition at the same time... If we're not careful, we may lose the beauty and simplicity of days gone by... When I was young, I played outside and didn't spend much time on the comp... XD!

No matter what, I'll always cherish my memories in primary and secondary school, and though we all have moved on, there will always be a part of me that cherishes every moment of it, through the good and bad times... =) The music helps the nostalgia alot... Certain music for certain years...

As for now, I'm going to complete another phase of my life, finishing my diploma, hopefully passing with flying colours, and then we'll see...

... and typing all this a day before my final exams, when I should be studying, but somehow this pre-empted all other things... ah memories... XD!

Been there, done that,,, Or have I?

Have you ever done something you wanted to do, yet you didn't? I'm sure everyone has that regret or missed opportunity to do something wonderful in life, or to take that chance that was in front of you...

A tuneful of emotions...

I should be so happy now after what happened today, yet as I settle down in my room, I tend to feel down, as if it was all a dream, and have to face the world tomorrow, back to normal, with the happy memories of today still fresh in the mind... After a high, here comes the low... But I really had a great day today, I got to spend time with my best friend, it's not everyday we can spend time, especially now that everyone's busy... So that's why I cherish and love every moment with my besties, loved ones, especially those I haven't met in a while...

This month has been a very good month indeed, so many memories, and moments to remember... It started on 1st July with an outing with my classmates from school, and how much I miss them alot! It was a fun day out with them... I was with Lorenzo, Diniy, Ray, Zeff, Anthea, Sammy, and it was awesome to be able to hangout with them again! We went to KKBox, then Suria to watch movie, then Waterfront for dinner... It was an awesome day! Miss ya all ow! =D

Then after Lifeline Armour Up Camp, I started to go to Lifeline, besides serving in RAY now... It's a nice new experience, besides serving in RAY, so yeah! The best of both worlds... ahaha!

Then the Convent concert, I went to support my sis Bianca for her choir, and yeah the concert was nice... The surprise was seeing Empty Papers perform, my friends performing! hahaha! It was an awesome show, too bad about the sound system, which was off... If not, it would have been a rocking show! Of course the main purpose was to see the choir... It was nice, and I enjoyed it, the rest of the performances as well... If can I want to support her every performance possible! U go Bianca! =D

After that, THE FINAL on 11th July, 12th July here Malaysian time, and we all know what happened... VIVA ESPANA! LA FURIA ROJA! SPAIN are the WORLD CHAMPIONS! YEAHHHH! Even now I still feel the same rush of blood, the same excitement, relief, happiness, proudness, just pure pure emotion and victorious spirit!! Spain, 2010 World Cup Winners! YEAH!!!! COME ON SPAIN! A por ellos! A por ellos!

Then the night I will never forget, what a night with my 2 besties, 2 of the finest and hottest prospects and musical talents in Malaysia, Lorenzo and Anthea! Those 2 can sing! They can sing! It's smokin hot!! Their covers are awesome and nice! And to have the *ahem!* honour to be able to join them and record with them is brilliant! ahaha... Those 2 really have talent... (I wonder if they read this, will they kembang to the max? XD!) It was an awesome night, and it was fun! We got to record at Anthea's place, then went out for dinner an Upperstar, nice! Then we headed back before going home... And it was nice to test Loren's driving "skills", nice2... XD! One to remember! hahaha!

Then last Sunday I went out with my bestfriend, Jacquelene Danica, and we hung out and went to watch movie before she leaves for KL again... Gonna miss ya Jac! Had a fun day out with ya! hehe... Nice oh the movie "Despicable Me"! So cute and funny, and at the same time touching! awww! =D It's been a while since I met her, since CNY, so yeah it was nice to meet up again... ^^v

Which leads to today, Sunday, 25 July, my dad's birthday, and also celebrating RAY 9th Anniversary, and had a great day with my bestie Angelica Subil! hahaha... It was a fun day, although I was sick, I just ignored it and had a blast! XD!

So it's been a wonderful month! XD! VIVA ESPANA!

Confusion...

maybe being heartbroken makes it easier to leave this place and go away... this is not running away from the situation, but trying to start a new life...

seriously, I don't even understand myself anymore... ='( and the sad part is, I don't know how long it'll take for me to ever be OK again, maybe never forever...

I used to be this happy, friendly, happy go lucky kinda guy with no sort of worries or pressures, just enjoying life and taking on challenges that really attract me... but now I've become some sort of this recluse, being all to myself, and not being open anymore... I've become more and more reclusive and shy, back to last time...

Take you all the way back then, when I was a shy little kid with a shy attitude, and actually now I'm still abit shy, I don't talk much except to my best friends, then you'll see a different me, talkative and annoying.... hahaha! But yeah, I'm very shy when it comes to people, yet if I wanna talk and lead, I can be brave and different, just as long as they tell me what to do, then I'm confident... but if it's one on one with people, than that's a different matter altogether...

Why I bring this up is because I think my withdrawn personality and shyness has costed me alot of opportunities, to do stuff, to make a difference, because of my shy and timidness... Such as being invited for outings or hangouts... Nowadays I rarely go out except if I bring people out, or my best friends bring me out... That's why now I rarely go out and watch movies, and I'm so outdated, except if I happen to watch that movie or so on... Sometimes if I really get depressed then I would really hate going out because I'm gonna be all alone or no friends, but on the other hand I'm stuck at home nothing to do all alone, same thing... Conclusion? My life's lonely.... VERY...

There comes a time where I hated it, I hated being lonely, and I really miss them, and yet people don't understand... Some people think because I'm shy, that I'm snobbish, I'm proud, etc... Actually I'm just really really shy and don't know what to say... I gotta admit I have to improve my PR skills... The loneliness makes me miss my loved ones more and more, and I wish I can see them now and just forget all my worries... haizz...

Now what I'm thinking...

No mood... That’s what everyone says when they have no mood or no feelings towards something or someone, or if they’ve been hurt by loved ones, or if something bad happened which made them lose their mood... for me now, I really have no mood to study... I know tests are next week, but I still haven’t started studying yet... I’m just mentally tired, I really feel like hitting my head on a brick wall... I really pray I can pass this final semester, and get it all over and done with...

Life sure has taken a very different turn... I’m thankful of where I am now, with all my friends and family around me... Sometimes I really thank God for granting me wonderful people around me, whom I can trust and love so much... I don’t want to name names for fear of leaving out anyone, so this goes to everyone yeah... hehe... Soon my diploma will be over, and actually I’m inspired to write this post after reading my best friend Jacquelene’s blog, talking about her experiences in A-Level, so I’ll be talking about my college experience soon...

Talking about college life now...

The last 2 years in diploma has sure been one heck of a ride... so many semesters we had to go through, luckily I passed, none failed, although very close to failing twice, and so many friends made and old friends reconnected at college... I’m sure gonna miss life in INTI, but as my friend said, we all have to move on, and I want to get new experience, learn new things, visit new places... I don’t want to be stagnant here in KK...

I have met and known so many wonderful people at INTI, and without them my life would have been lonely, so yeah... especially my classmates, and I’m sorry if I did anything wrong, I guess I have still alot to learn in life... I think my classmates are interesting and nice, and it’s good to have them... this will be the final semester for most of us that made it.... it’s been a very rollercoaster journey, but It’s something I will remember always, especially the trips between classes... XD!

On to current issues now...

Right now I’m very gutted and sad that I wasn’t able to join my mates in doing mission work for LT Camp, and it’s the first one I missed since, well, the first one! It’s so sad, and had I known the test will be postponed earlier, I would have been down there already... But I’m really happy and I salute and respect everyone who served the mission work, and what a great job, doing it for God, spreading the word and preaching, it’s something that’s not easy to do, so yeah! =D Praise God! Wonderful!

I guess that’s it for now... I want to say more, but I don’t think it’ll fit in here with what I’ve said, so next time then!

2010 FIFA World Cup is go!

It's on! It's here! It's the World Cup 2010 in South Africa! haha... The opening match was South Africa vs Mexico, and a cagey game, which had many chances, ended up 1-1, so they cancelled out each other... Tactically it was a frustrating game, there were many opportunities by both teams that should have led to more goals, but oh well... (I won't go much into the game, this is as a starter for my post...)

That's a good way to start off this World Cup, and indeed my blog after a long time... It's been very long since I'd blogged, so the touch has gone awry indeed... Lately I'm so happy because I get to spend time with my loved ones, and that is one of the most important thing, we should try to keep going, be happy, do what we love, and enjoy it...

I'm in my last semester now of my diploma, and it's been some ride, this 2 years! Lots of ups and downs, I can't tell you how it feels, amazing and exasperating! Now I think I've more or less settled down, this is my final sem, so relax and enjoy it, and make sure I pass or else I'm in big trouble! But yeah, enjoy it, and when it's over, diploma's done... and that's just the start...

My last post was I think about what happened, and I thank God and I'm happy that all of it's in the past, and now it's better, for me... Since then, I sorted out my life, and got back up again, and here I am!

I'm happy coz last Wednesday, I got to spend time with my bro Aldric and sis Bianca, and we watched Shrek in 3D, the first time for any of us, and even though things didn't turn out as planned, it was still fun and I enjoyed it... The effect was nice, but at RM 15 it's a tad expensive, so maybe only once in a while, and I think normal movies are still good enough... My bro was with his lady, so I was with my sis... then we went to Secret Recipe's for a drink and rest, and it was nice to spend time with my sis, not often I can say that 'coz we're both busy lately... so yeah it was a nice day... wish there were more of us, but I can't complain... so thanks to Aldric and Bianca... hehe... Love ya! <3

Since my last post, last May, I enjoyed the holidays, but was busy with work, and then the Thomas Cup... Sadly for Malaysia, we lost in the semifinals, but still it was a good achievement to reach the semis, so congratulations... I remember following almost every match, and watching it to learn more, learn tactics and improve my game, and most of all, to support my team... Now it's over, post mortem done, next target is the World Championships in August... Lee Chong Wei and Koo Kien Keat-Tan Boon Heong, come on!

Started this final sem in middle of May, and to be honest I still havent got back to the study groove yet, I'm like still in holiday mood, and I can't quite gear myself up yet, and with so many events coming, it's gonna be hard... This June will be busy, with tests soon, and KK Jazz Fest on 18-19 June, so looking forward to that, IU Day also on 19 June, a must go with friends, and my cousin's birthday later! (It's Saturday by the time I write this)... so yeah! Lots to come!

2010 World Cup has started, and just like every previous tournament I have watched and wrote about, I'm backing Spain again, they're my favourite team since I was little, so yeah... Spain all d way! Viva Espana! La Furia Roja! I hope they can win the whole tournament and be the best! I'm so excited and looking forward to this World Cup! The last one in Germany was awesome, can this be better? Let's wait and see...

South Africa 2010, here we come!

From my heart....

if I told you I loved you and I never meant to hurt you, would you believe in a word I say? Would you believed it if I said my life was a mess without you being there for me and being my helping hand? And what if you disappeared from my life, I said that I couldn't live another day without you? That's how much I love you, not as lovers, but as friends... ♥

Broken records

Why do I say that? Because my life really sucks, its like a broken record all over again... same things keep repeating itself no matter how much I tried to prevent it from happening again, no matter how much I change and improve, and find out what went wrong... I always get broken hearted and eventually dumped everytime, and it hurts... no matter how much you forgive and forget, the scars are there... I'm not young anymore, so I ain't exactly got much time to be around, aren't I?

I really hate my life... I'm lonely, miserable, sad, pathetic, useless, unloved, unwanted and seemingly to some people, a burden instead of a gift... I wonder if the things that they say are true, sometimes I just can't trust people and what they say after so many heartbreaks... As much as I try to believe, sometimes I just can't... And I know life's all about this and being tough, being strong, sometimes it can get to you...

I just don't know what to do now, I'm feeling so frustrated, sad, and really hurt in my heart... In times like these I normally turn to my "family", my bro and sis, and my besties, but now it seems that all of them are busy and have no time for me... Although I fully understand... I just wish I can talk to one of them now and just let everything out! But not anyone, it has to be my loved ones, and the ones I REALLY trust... no more random secret spilling... I don't trust anyone easily nowadays anymore... The family list you see on my FB, THOSE are the people I trust, care and love no matter what, this is for sure... =) and some best friends that I really trust as well...

I just wanna talk to them!

Opposite ends....

In one month, I've gone from an absoulte high to an absoulte low... And the most disappointing thing is that this could have been completely avoided if it wasn't for my own stupid actions... I really let my sis down, I really let her down and disappointed her as a brother, and as a family... Not only that, I also disappointed my best friends and put them in an awkward position...

Last month, I was on an absoulte high after camp, and looking more determined then ever to be a better person... But then this happened, and I think I know why it happened... And I guess I'm thankful that this has been a wake up call that I urgently needed, and the good thing is that me and my sis are OK again, although as all things, time is needed...

I just want to issue a public apology to you whom I have hurt and disappointed over the last week, and I want to make things right... It's in the past now, so forget about it and move on... A brighter future lies ahead...

This last month, especially the last week, has been really tough for me... Too many disappointments overshadow the highs and good moments, and right now I need to get my life back on track... It's no use just talking, I have to walk the talk...

I think I really need a break from life now, just a short break away from everyone to reflect on this past month or so, see what went wrong, and do it right... But I just can't have that break... Its one that I desperately need...

No matter what happens, I will always love my family, my sis and my bro, my bestfriends... This is one for you... With lots of love...

Up In Dust...

If you should ever know this
Is that I never wanted to leave you
But you know better and went your own way
Thinking you know all too well

Letting go of the hand that held you
The one thing you could rely on
As you had that moment to fly
Flying without a rudder

Every memory, moment and decision
All to be with you forever
Yet you let it all go away
Leaving me behind in the dust

It's funny how time can make or break things
Sad to say it's completely over
All little hope, any memory left has all gone up in dust
Leaving you to live your life without me in it

You had so many people around you telling what to do
Around you had many to take care of you
That it seems that I'm no longer wanted or needed
Whatever happened to all the things we said?

After all that's said and done
I just want you to live your life
And if it doesn't have me in it after all the memories
Then alll I can do is walk away into the distance and say goodbye...

After all this time, I'm not needed...

(I wrote this inspired by Daughtry and David Cook, and after a heartbreak sometime ago, and after looking back at the memories that matter to me yet seem little to others... Just a thought, nothing personal, I'm just a songwriter and singer and musician... These are the things that inspire us to write songs...)

Coming back to life...

Where were you when I was burned and broken
While the days slipped by from my window watching
Where were you when I was hurt and helpless
Because the things you say and the things you do surround me
While you were hanging yourself on someone else's words
Dying to believe in what you heard
I was staring straight into the shining sun

Lost in thought and lost in time
While the seeds of lifeand the seeds of change were planted
Outside the rain fell dark and slow
While I pondered on this dangerous but irresistible pastime
I took a heavenly ride through our silence
I knew the moment had arrived
For killing the past and coming back to life

I took a heavenly ride through our silence
I knew the waiting had begun
And headed straight..into the shining sun

Ideas of Ideas... Get It?

Do you? Hahaha... well that's some way to start my note off... If this were to be my English Composition essay, I'm not sure if that will go down well, but since it's my own note, I'll give it a shot... Ideas of ideas... Now some of you might think "What has this bugger been up to" or the likes, but hang in there, and I'll make sense of this, I promise you...

... well, maybe not... But that certainly got your attention going right? Now on to the real stuff, the bread and butter of my note...

Ideas are a state of mind, the things that we think of or come into the head, and off we go... Ideas lead to many a splendid thing, but it can also be the reverse, it could lead to worse... Music, essentially, are ideas in the form of music and words... Now here's an interesting question, what comes first, the music or the words?

Lately I haven't been writing much, due to my busy schedule, and now I suddenly find myself free, to think, to comprehend, and to carry on where I've left off some time ago, writing notes and songs... Now comes the first, then soon comes the songs... Inspiration, here I come!

The month January ended, now it's already a week into February, and notice how time ticks away so fast... Time waits for no man, so they say... It was hectic, now with assignments, and I'm looking to get started off as soon as possible.. The groundwork is there already, now on to the thing itself...

I was reading some of my friends' notes about social justice, and I have to say, some were good stuff, some were alright, but It's not up to me to judge, I'm just a reader of works... I read books, articles, interesting stuff and so on... And I write as well... Good job guys and gals!

Which leads me to a good example of social justice that I came to be aware of some 3 years ago, called Solidarinosc, or Solidarity in Polish, which I've written about and highlighted about many times before, with little or no interest, except for one or two... For those of you wanting to know more, you know where to go, your little friend called Google... Now this is the 21st century well and truly alive...

It's nice to see technology used in such a positive way, in the world where it has been used for the opposite... Certainly the world is moving at such a fast pace... I was talking to my friend about it, highlighting that for our generation, in LT we used pen and paper... Today, it's all advanced and internet plots the way now... Sounds old, do I? Well, I ain't THAT old, it was only 2 years ago... hahaha...

I suppose that's it for now... If i keep on going, I'm going to bore you all to sleep, and I wouldn't want that, would I? The world as wee see it will never be the same again... And I shall leave you with a closing thought...

"On the day the wall came down
They threw the locks onto the ground
And with glasses high we raised a cry for freedom had arrived"

Whirlwind...

The last month has been a rollercoaster, and to be truthful I'm still hungover from last December holidays, and I really, really miss the holidays, and doing what I did, and all, it was really fantastic, but now it's in the past, time to start over, and continue on with my life, and hope it will all happen again...

As I said, last December was really great because I got to be together with all the people that I really love, and I would love to do it again next time round... Hopefully things will be the same, if not better then before... But for now, it's time to buckle down and study...

It's remarkable I've been busy with this and that until I haven't had time to settle down and take it all in, let the facts and memories settle in, it's just been one big rush, enjoyable, but stressful also, and the aftereffects can still be felt now...

After coming down to earth from New Year's and a Thanksgiving night with my friends and sis the night before classes, the same week I was going to KL for 9 days, for the INTIMA Conference (the conference was only 3 days, the 6 was to settle, move and shop! haha!) and that same Saturday, I was off again, barely having time to settle down...

9th January, Saturday, arrived at KL, and straightaway went to look for my good friend Jacquelene, and it was nice to meet her again after a while (a year!), so went to watch movie, Old Dogs, it was super funny! Thinking of the movie straightaway makes me laugh, so does Couples Retreat! (watched that back in December, wow!) We went walking around before that, explore Times Square, nice place, but 1st time its abit confusing... hehe... Had a fun day/night out... Thanks Jacq!

10th January, Sunday, woke up to go to mass there at St. John Church, it was my 1st time attending mass there, so I didn't know the way, so Jacq taught me how, then managed to arrive at the nearest (kinda...) station, and walk to the church... Have to say the mass there was different abit... Interesting sidenote, there were many photographers on the way, nearby, and remember this was JUST after the well-publicised attacks (which I will not go into, no politics for me)...

Then after that went to Times Square again, and saw the Nikon Roadshow, fantastic, what cameras! The photographers all had kickass SLRs that would knock the stuffing off my camera, THAT's for sure! Then we took a pic for charity, in a nice photo booth, using the new Nikon D3X (WOW!) and it was a nice picture! Then I went home, and spent the night about Bukit Bintang... It was a nice weekend... hehe kan Jacq! =)

11th-13th January, Monday-Wednesday, I went out with my collegemates, Kimberly, Jenette, Chloe, Eric and special guest Nicky (OMG!) and Jenette's friend, and on the last day with Bryan and Evelyn! On Monday, we went to 1Utama and the Curve, Damansara, and it was a LONG day and night out! hahaha... On Tuesday, we went to Midvalley Megamall in the afternoon, which was nice, its been a long time, and Pavillion in the evening... On Wednesday, we went out to Pavillion, Bukit Bintang and in and around Bintang area... The 3 days were really nice and funny! It was nice, tiring, but worth it, right guys? haha!

14th January, Thursday, did some last minute shopping with them, and got ready to go to Subang for the conference... We went by taxi to 3K Hotel, located quite far from our host, Metropolitan College, for the 7th INTIMA Conference 2010, and settled in the night before...

15-17 January, Friday-Sunday, The conference, I will do a separate review on it, but briefly, it was 3 days of fun, sun, and issues (literally...) haha! Went back to KK at midnight (would you believe it!) and returned home close to 1 am on a Monday morning! Thank God my class was at 1 pm... haha!

SO overall, my trip to KL was a blast, it was awesome, but not without problems and tensions, luckily it was mild, and I really enjoyed it, because it was the first time I went travelling with friends, I got to meet my good friend whom I havent seen in a year, and I had many expriences during the conference, and it was really nice... And that's a wrap!

Kings and Queens

Hello, and welcome to 2010, and to all, Happy New Year! =D The new year has dawned upon us, and brings many a change and mystery... All to play for innit?

This is my first note of the year, and the new year was OK... Unlike many who went to partied or clubbing, I spent my new year in my house, outside my garden, watching the fireworks, calling and texting all my friends... I guess it was alright, kinda fun, and I got to wish my closest ones a Happy New Year! =D

The new year, the 1st day, I went to witness my cousin's engagement, so balik kampung for the 1st day... Kinda nice and relaxing, and it was funny, although long... Still, I got to learn... And later I went to my uncle's house, and met my cousins, nice... =D its been a while since I last went there...

2nd day, my mum's workmate had a wedding reception at Hongkod, or KDCA Hall, and we went, and the place was empty! So unlike Ka'amatan season, where the whole place was alive, awesome! Today, however, it was quiet, with the exception of the reception, so enjoyed it as well, the place brought many memories to me, so nostalgic... But then at night I cried, because of something that dawned on me...

3rd day, today, was the last day of holiday, and sadly, the last day for a long time that I will be able to meet my sis Bianca... yeah, from now on her HP will be taken, so no text and calls during school... I'm OK with that, its for her own good also, but it'll be sad that I can't talk 2 her and share things and experiences... =( this holidays I really got close with my besties, and I can't imagine if I can't contact with them all again, that's scary... =(

I really miss my lil sis, coz she and I share alot of secrets with each other, and trust... Guess this is the test of time, whether after this we can still communicate the way it used to be... Until then, take care sis! <3 ya! =) I don't care if people don't understand this, as long as I have this family, I will keep them in my heart... They're what I have, and I really treasure each and everyone of them... =)

So as a new year dawns, and I hope this year I can be a better person, and maintain my studies, as well as keeping in touch with all my friends, and (most of all) getting fitter! hahahaha! That's a must, I need to get fit to start training soon!

Bianca Biancie budu budu! Miss ya! =P!